Chasing Joy

So this is the point where I wanna explode. Explode from frustrations, anger, despair, disbelief, disappointment. This is where I ask myself- is it just me? Am I being too hard on myself, or too hard on others? Why do I think like people can be so incomprehensibly incompetent? Without being subjective, I just feel and see people swallowed by the system, the culture, the values, that they've been so comfortably working with for God only knows since when! So this is the part where I am almost convinced this may not be where I should belong. Maybe I am not supposed to stay. Maybe I am not meant to go back. Because just being in the same space and time with these people make me feel sick. It's like I am automatically turn "nega" and "toxic". They say people have a choice. You can always leave. But should you be the one to leave? Is it fair for these kind of people to stay?

If there is one thing people from the world over agree on, it is that life is short. Even when they say life begins at 40. At whatever age we find ourselves at, I think there is a modicum of truth, if not absolute truth when we say, time passes by so swiftly without us really realizing it. If life is so fleeting, how do you really live every moment of it? Maybe the easier question is what do you do with the short time given to you in this world? What if all you ever have is your most precious time? If I was meant to answer that question at this point in time, I would say my daily routine would be waking up, making coffee or breakfast, watching morning news, reading, playing the guitar, watching TV (sure I can't do without some form of entertainment like The Voice Season 14 and Masterchef Kids Season 6), watching evening news, bedtime reading, sleeping... repeat. And of course, an hour of walking as my workout at least four times a week. I have spent 15 years of my life workin...